How does our self-esteem and body image effect our appearance? Does it really matter since what is supposed to really matter is what’s on the inside, right?
Yes, it’s true that what really matters is what’s on the inside but if our insides (our self-esteem and body image) are struggling then our outsides might begin to suffer. Think about when you have a cold, don’t you put less effort into your clothes, hair, and make-up? I know I certainly do!
When we struggle with poor self-esteem or body image, we may begin to dress ourselves in a way to cover up or hide the body we don’t like. You wake up one morning feeling bloated and gross so you wear more loosely fitting clothes. Then you see your reflection in the mirror in the baggy clothes and think, “Ugh, I’m so fat!”; now you really feel bad about yourself on top of the bloat! Then you go to lunch and get the burger and fries b/c why bother trying it doesn’t matter what you eat, you’re just a hideous, bloated, fat cow. You eat the burger and fries then feel guilty for it because, after all, hideous bloated fat cows shouldn’t eat, ever. Maybe this cycle continues long enough to turn into depression and you get to the point where you’re doing well to just get out of bed in the morning much less wash, dry, and style your hair and do your make-up. So instead you go with the low pony, again! And being a hideous bloated, fat cow it doesn’t matter if you do your make-up or hair because no one is looking at you or caring about you. This may be a slight exaggeration on the mind of a woman struggling with self-esteem and body image but I’d wager we’ve all been there at some point.
Our insides effect our outsides.
So how do we know if our insides are negatively effecting our outsides? You may want to do a personal check up and ask yourself a few important questions:
•Has my outward self changed recently?
•Do I practice healthy self-care like I used to, or have I never practiced self-care?
•Do I focus more on the negatives about myself than the positives?
•Do I quickly dismiss or minimize compliments?
If you find yourself hating the mirror, avoiding pictures, or in a rut you may be struggling with negative self-esteem and body image. Don’t worry, you can improve it! A healthy self-esteem takes care and maintenance kind of like a car. If I don’t change the oil, rotate my tires and fill it with gas, my car isn’t going to work very well or for very long. The same goes with us!
Rather than stare at and list out all of your imperfections in the mirror, pick out your strengths and things you like about yourself. If you can’t come up with anything, ask a trusted friend. I’ll give you an example, I really like my hair. It’s thick, shiny, full of body and I can usually make it do what I want it to do. So rather than focus on my stretch marks which make me feel crappy, (see above negative “cow” rant), I can focus on my hair which makes me feel good. If I feel good, I’m more likely to dress myself well, in clothes and colors that flatter. Then I might smile a bit bigger, walk a little taller and make more eye contact with those around me.
Our insides effect our outsides!
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